Lesotho: Not flamboyant enough, redefining bisexual visibility

As a human rights lawyer and a bisexual woman, my journey has been shaped not only by my work but also by the discrimination I have faced, sometimes from the very community I belong to. It was not my sexuality alone that drew judgment; it was the fact that I did not fit the stereotypical or expected expressions of it. I was told more than once that I was not “flamboyant enough,” as if authenticity needed to be performed. Those comments pushed me inward, making me retreat and hide parts of myself out of fear of being judged, excluded, or misunderstood.

For a long time, I carried this silently. I moved carefully, protecting myself from being seen too closely. But in that silence, the people who stood by me, my friends, became my strength. Their unwavering support helped me reclaim my confidence. Through them, I learned to embrace my sexuality with pride, even in spaces where stigma and discrimination still linger. They reminded me that visibility does not have to be loud to be valid; it simply needs to be true.

Over time, I began to understand that many of the attitudes I encountered were rooted not in malice but in ignorance and a lack of exposure. Through ongoing training and awareness programmes, I watched mindsets shift. Community members who once held narrow views came to understand that discrimination, in any form, is a violation of our constitutional and human rights. Seeing these transformations affirmed my belief that change is possible when people are given the tools to rethink what they thought they knew.

The most profound lesson I carry is this: I have learned to embrace my sexuality with pride and confidence, regardless of the stigma and discrimination that still exist in some spaces. This truth continues to guide me.

My experiences have shown me that discrimination can come even from those who are expected to understand. But they have also taught me the power of sharing one’s story. I tell mine because I believe deeply in the impact of lived experiences, how they can inspire, challenge, and create meaningful change. If my journey can encourage even one person to live openly and authentically, then sharing it is worthwhile.

Looking ahead, I hope to continue contributing to a society where people are not boxed in by expectations of how they should look, act, or love. I want to keep using my voice, my work, and my truth to help shape spaces where everyone, regardless of their identity, feels seen, respected, and safe. My dream is simple but profound: that more of us can live freely, without fear, and that our stories can help light the way for others.